FInding out how screwed I am – Ich bin so gestresst!

My alarm woke me up at 6.30 in order to not upset my German host family and make sure that I made it in time for breakfast! I quickly got dressed and brushed my teeth (something told me they didn’t tend to stumble downstairs in their pants and take a swig from the carton). Despite my disgusting cold I could smell fresh brewing coffee. Sure enough, on the dot 7am; it was put out on the table and I went through. After breakfast I applied for more flats on WG-Gesucht. I really loved one of them and decided to give them a phone call. I asked the man who answered if the flat was still available and he sounded very confused – “Aber dies ist keine Wohnung. Es ist eine Kirchenkantine!” – “But this isn’t a flat, this is a church cantine!”… “oops… ciao!” Then I left the house to catch my train to the Uni where I picked up my guide books and Begrussungsgeld form (they give you 50 EUR ´welcome Money´).


It was so unbelievably warm and sunny. Even just being outside made me so happy, and I worried a bit about whether that novelty would wear off. As of yet it hasn’t. 🙂

    But the weather was about to metaphorically turn…

This post will be a pretty moany one but it’s just to accurately depict the struggles one must face as a flat seeker (homeless person) in Berlin. Turns out they don’t really like people skirting about without residences. A German phone – contract or pay as you go requires an address and a bank account!! To open a bank account you need a government letter confirming your Berlin residence and to get that letter you need obviously a place to stay and a confirmed regular income. Basically find a flat or gtfo. So when I went to set up my bank account and phone contract I was shoved out like the vagabond I am back onto the flat hunting rat race… Quite scary!

So if you’ll imagine I am standing on Alexanderplatz with no internet on my smartphone and no German bank account (which you need to have for almost ALL ATMs!) What do I do? I go on a Wi Fi hunt… I need to apply for flats now and go for interviews everywhere and sign a god damn lease.


So I go into many an establishment. “Haben Sie hier W-Lan?” (*show me the WiFi pleeeaaase) was met with confused expressions and answers such as “we don’t have WiFi we have sandwiches” ?!?!? So I did another shameful thing: I went to Starbucks. I’m sorry, ok?

I came back to my flat really deflated but my dead sweet host mum had left me stuff for my tea. I retired up to my room and applied for yet more. Well, I thought, there’s good days and bad days. I made another futile attempt at securing a flat viewing and then went to my bed. I did see some kind of cool things in Alex Platz at night though – like this class act:

 [ALEX PLATZ VIDEO] xvjjweskfi//djanc_ahsiajfeasg]]

And I’ll leave end there with some good German hip hop to remind me that I’m in Berlin and that’s all that matters.




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